8 things you should know before losing your gay virginity

Before we get into this unconventional topic, there is one step to take: let's leave concepts like “gay”, “bi” or “queer” behind. Orientation is not what matters. What matters is that the relationship between men is amazing, beautiful and passionate. It's also hard to imagine having it if you're still a virgin. In this article, we are going to show you the different types of sex, safety issues and other important aspects in this article.

1. Be emotionally ready

After a certain age, we are all physically ready for sex. When it comes to being emotionally prepared, it's a different story. Of all things in life, sex is one of the healthiest. If you're not ready, you can use sex as a form of self-expression.
Imagine having to explain to a religious family what you are doing. Does it look petrifying? Maybe you're not ready for this.
Going to the other extreme is also not good. Very few actually boast that they have it all figured out and are completely comfortable with who they are. However, ask yourself if you are ready to experiment, start this adventure and face any challenges that come your way.

2. Having sex with another man does not (automatically) make you gay

Some men who have sex with other men are bi. Some don't know what they are and that's okay. Don't worry about labels and concepts. When you're ready, you'll find the right word. Until then, don't be afraid to experiment and don't attempt sexual activities (consensual, always!).

3. Forget the porn you watch

There's nothing wrong with pornography... just don't expect it to be really sex. It's a fantasy – unrealistic, edited, clean. In real life, nobody has sex like that.
Also, don't be in a hurry, especially with anal penetration. It might not work the first time. It requires a lot of patience and trust when you are just starting out.

Try not to get your hopes up and don't think it's going to be amazing the first time around. Unhurried. Do it and some get a handjob, oral sex or just spend time enjoying yourself. Hugging, massaging, and kissing are great ways to start.

Once you have some experience with it, it may be a little more experimented with sex toys to relax a little more. The realistic vibrators or stimulators that can be amazing.

4. Not knowing what you want is good

People believe they know they are getting to know. If you're a virgin, that can't be the case.

You may not be sure, even if you have been sexually active for many, many years. Fantasies are one thing, but turning them into reality can be difficult, if not impossible.

In short, few people know what they want when they start. Experience is what will help you learn.

5. Bottoming might hurt

Back to anal – yes, it will probably hurt it the first time. If you don't use enough lubricant and go too fast, you may feel pain. Take it carefully and slowly, use lots of silicone-based lubricant (safe with condoms) and take a break whenever necessary.

Tops do not need to be dominant or masculine, nor do bottoms need to be feminine, submissive, or underage. Roles only define what you are doing sexually, not your way of life, your behavior, like clothes you wear or anything else.

Many people enjoy being a bottom as well as being a top, all depends in the partners and scenarios. As a beginner, you should try both, only then will you understand what you like best.

6. Forget Slut-Shaming

There is no place for gay slut shaming in our community. Why? Because there is no “healthy” or “right” number of times to have sex. Some people need more, others less. Having sex less often doesn't necessarily make a partner safer. Get tested for STDs regularly.

7. Your sex life is only about yourself

Yours is nobody's business. You don't have to share it with others if you don't want to.

8. Take STDs seriously

Any sex puts you at risk for STDs: HIV, gonorrhea, genital warts, to name a few. Some clinics have experience working with and treating gay people. There is no symptom of a hellish thing from your doctor and relate anything in the body that you believe cannot be related to one. And test yourself whenever possible.

Inlcusive, condoms are extremely important for anal sex. So always have - at least - one close by.

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